On truth, and acting on it

"Fact-check your memory, and bullshit-check your motives."
-Dinty W. Moore (writer, teacher)

"Complacency and cynicism are our biggest enemies."
-Lissa Muscatine (former HRC speechwriter and Washington Post journalist; co-owner of Politics & Prose bookstore in D.C.)

"And they are illusions."
-Michael Waldman (President of the Brennan Center of Justice at NYU)

I spent this frigid weekend non-parentally adulting much more than I usually do. It was a delight.

Yesterday I attended a creative nonfiction workshop in D.C., led by Dinty Moore (founder and editor of the literary magazine, Brevity, amongst other things) and Lee Gutkind (founder and editor of the lit mag, Creative Nonfiction, also amongst other things). Not only did I see in person three friends with whom I mostly interact online (writing groups), but also I felt like a student again, all note-taking, and coffee-drinking, and thinking until my brain ached. I loved every second.

Today, I brought Jack to the first of a series of teach-ins hosted by a D.C. gem, Politics & Prose bookstore. Moderated by Lissa Muscatine, panelists David Cole (the ACLU's National Legal Director), Todd Cox (Director of Policy at the NAACP Legal Defense and Educational Fund), and Michael Waldman (President of the Brennan Center of Justice at NYU) discussed American civil liberties, past and future, in the context of Trump and the 2016 election. (To watch the event, click here.)

Jack was so engaged in the election that I thought he'd be keen on this teach-in. He was not. He did, however, appear to read the entirety of the new DK book about Rogue One while I enjoyed nearly 90 minutes of the panel discussion, so win/win. Bonus: we left with an excellent chocolate chip cookie and a copy of The Phantom Tollbooth, yet another book I missed during my own childhood and so am reading now with J. 

Both the workshop and the teach-in were engaging and inspiring, and were I made to sum both up with one sentence, I'd say: Find the truth and write about/act on it.

Truth is what happened, what is and/or what is provable. In theory, truth shouldn't be elusive. And yet, because we are human, truths often appear to be mercurial shape-shifters. My memory or yours? The lenses provided by geography, faith, peers, experience. Those things color truths, but do they negate them?

It may appear that truth is so malleable, it may feel that it is, but I believe the truth is always there: we simply (never so simple, really) must acknowledge it. To live honestly, we must support and defend it.

Waldman began by reminding us of the "consent of the governed" condition noted in the Declaration; it is a condition generally considered necessary for a government to be legitimate. Since our founders argued over this, our country has continued to, fighting to uphold the institutional arrangements that protect our democracy and civil liberties.

We have failed at times, refusing, for example, the right to vote to too many for too long.

But what do we do when advances made are clawed back? When the Voting Rights Act that tried to mandate and ensure voting rights for African Americans is gutted, when not one question in 26 presidential debates asked about that backwards movement, when an unqualified man known to cheat others and who has real and substantiated racist claims against him in his past then becomes president? What to do when he then nominates a hyper-Right senator barred previously from judgeship because of racism to serve as the Attorney General of the U.S., a position that requires fair, unbiased judicial ability?

What do we do? We fight. 

In the same way many writers struggle to candidly share their truths--knowing that is the way to heal and strengthen and live most honestly--we citizens must now fight to do the same for our country.

"Our concern and anger is only effective if we fight," David Cole said. Previous presidents "only made changes to unpopular moves when people forced it." This is especially critical now, when it's quite possible that the only checks and balances against the incoming administration are us, the people.

This will take loud, unceasing efforts at local, state, and federal levels.
It will take us holding our Congressional representatives' feet to the blazing fire of truth and justice and courage, to demand that they do their jobs which are on our behalf. It will require some of us to run for office because our elected officials are failing.

It will require supporting real journalism and people who work in conjunction with them. We will need to stop falling for superficial, click-bait nonsense and instead be willing to invest more time in real reading and questioning and learning.
It demands that we stop, here and now, false equivalencies of candidates and behaviors.
It will take all of us defending and shoring up expansive societal norms and civil institutions that protect the rights of many versus the desires of a few. 
It will demand regular reminders to those who wish to constrict others' rights that "your liberty is my liberty." (-Todd Cox)

It will require us to be brave and stalwart, to expect backlash and to be prepared for it. If we give our consent via silence or inaction, then we are complicit in allowing ignorant, unqualified, mean-spirited, non patriots to "lead" us. 

I thought about all of this all day. About how truth is one thing we should all cherish and hold tight to, even when it's uncomfortable. Without norms, without empathy, without a shared commitment to each other, our democracy will crumble. Our country will. Brave are those who work, quietly or loudly, alone or with others, towards a truthful tomorrow.

And then there's Meryl. Please watch her powerful speech at tonight's Golden Globes.

Taking action

You simply can't believe the wind today. It's a never-ending current of gale-force bluster. Leaves whip through the air so fast you wonder if you really saw them. The trees' flexibility gives me yet another reason to respect and treasure them. The boys are high in the branches of one, and I am vaguely concerned they'll be blown out. The sky is marbleized in shades of blue, gray, and white, and my home is groaning and squeaking in unfamiliar ways. It's all a bit wild which feels appropriate really, given the state of much of America since the election.  

I have made more calls to state and national representatives this past week than in any other time period in my life. I called the House Oversight Committee (202-225-5074) to plead for a bipartisan review of Donald Trump's financials and apparent conflicts of interest. It took just a couple minutes, and the HOC is tallying calls - the more they get, the more likely the Committee is to demand ALL of Trump’s financial information. 

If you, too, are concerned about Trump's complete lack of transparency, please consider calling. The HOC will likely be closed most of Thanksgiving week, so I suggest trying tomorrow/ Monday. A decision will be rendered shortly thereafter. If you don't reach a person, feel free to leave a voicemail or keep trying. 

Unsure about what to say? Here's a starting point:

"Hello, my name is ________, and I live in [city/state]. I'm calling you today to ask that you request a thorough review of Mr. Trumps widespread business interests around the globe. I have deep concerns about a financial conflict of interest and what that means for our country. I am especially troubled by the fact that he never released his tax returns and that his children, who run his businesses, are on his transition team. Please encourage a bipartisan review of his financials."

I also called Paul Ryan's office as he is soliciting feedback on the proposed repeal of the Affordable Care Act. It's not a perfect bill, but I support it wholeheartedly. Do you want thousands of people to be stripped of health insurance? I don't. The Republicans haven't put forth any sort of plan for what might replace the ACA. So, if you, too, support leaving the ACA intact, please call Ryan's office: 202-225-3031.

Then, sit tight through the minute or two of silence. You will get a prompt regarding the ACA survey. Press 2 to participate. Then sit through the female-voiced description of Paul Ryan's position on the ACA, and press 1 to register your support for keeping it.

I have also called Chuck Schumer (202-224-6542), the Senate minority leader, to plead with him to continue opposing the appointment of Steve Bannon, known white nationalist, anti-semite, wife-abusing, sexist man Trump has named his chief strategist. See the above script for a starting point and alter accordingly.

And this morning I had the absolute pleasure of joining a group of neighbors at the Episcopal church near us that was vandalized with racist sentiment after the election. We held signs of solidarity and support and handed out yellow flowers of friendship. It was heartening to find other groups there too, standing against hate.

I believe fake/extremely exaggerated news and the spread of it were terribly problematic elements of this year's election. I have committed to sourcing and verifying news before I share it, to the very best of my ability, and I beseech you to do this same. This list, one of many, of conservative and liberal sites have been fact-checked and proved to fall somewhere on the spectrum of somewhat untrustworthy to pants-on-fire lies. Please also consider refusing to share lies and false information. We don't need our citizenry any more uninformed and politically ignorant than it already is.

I have engaged in many conversations this week about racism and heteronormative and white privilege. They are not always comfortable discussions, but this is not the time to sit idly by. The lack of education and degree of misinformation out there is staggering.

The more Trump tweets thin-skinned reactions, nominates ideologically extreme racists (Flynn, Sessions) to major positions, and brings his children in to meetings with foreign leaders, the more his supporters stay quiet in the face of his racist picks but loudly boo the cast of Hamilton and vandalize churches and schools, the more we must fight back, act, and do everything we can to attempt to protect our country from falling into a grossly mismanaged kleptocracy that has nothing to do with most of its citizens.

I am deeply worried, full of rage, and very sad. The only thing to do is speak up and act!

The Good Men Project

Today I was thrilled to make my debut on The Good Men Project, a site that seeks to best understand, and encourage action on, what it means to be a good man in the 21st century. My essay, What's Right Is Always Worth the Fight, is about watching last week's election with Jack and also about the larger responsibility and opportunity I feel I have as a mother raising two sons. 

Today also found me spending many hours with friends. I joined one in her kitchen to debrief about the election and also catch up as we rarely have enough time together. Over cups of tea and honest conversation, we made a double batch of Nanny's Cranberry Sauce for our Thanksgiving tables. I can't adequately tell you how much it means to me that so many have adopted one of Nanny's recipes as their own.

Later, I took a long walk with another friend, another woman of whom I'm deeply fond and never have enough time with. It was a beautiful fall day, albeit unseasonably warm, and it felt good to stride up and down hills together, admiring the foliage and feeling the sun's heat on our cheeks.

My throat aches tonight, and I am taking myself to bed with a new book, Hillbilly Elegy. As Trump announces his appointees, I find myself increasingly worried about the future of our country. Jeff Sessions, an on-the-record racist, and Mike Flynn, an outspoken anti-Islamist, are not tolerant men. Please, friends, take action against this bigotry!