The robin that wanted a shower

Our old yard was a shady place, and I became adept at planting things that didn't need much beyond inconsistent mottled light. In stark contrast, the sun beats down on our new property from morning 'til night. This is an absolute joy in terms of what I can plant and what will thrive, but all those hours of unrelenting rays take their toll on both soil and shoot. 

After many hot hours in the front yard yesterday, I pulled the hose over and set about sprinkling everything down, washing away mulch and dust and giving my plant babies a much-needed drink. I arced my arm right to left, left to right, over and over again, noticing the droplets that hung from leaves and those that sparkled like ephemeral diamonds in the air.

A few birds flew by and landed in the crepe myrtle nearest me. They looked hungrily at the wet plume but kept their distance; all except for one, a sweet little robin with trusting eyes. 

Hop, hop, pause. Arc left, arc right. Hop, hop, nearer. A cock of the head, one eye studying me intently.

"Come here, sweet thing. You must be hot. Come have a cool bath. I won't hurt you." I cooed.

Hop, hop, into the spray. 

Y'all, that sweet bird was blissed out, and so was I. It ruffled its feathers, shook its head, danced about in the refreshing mist. Having now held the hose aloft for a fair amount of time, my arm was quivering, but you couldn't have paid me to lower it or release the sprinkler head trigger.

The robin looked at me again before returning to the crepe myrtle and heading on. I smiled and let the hose drop, ready to start cleaning up so I could head in. 

A few minutes later, a little robin with a trusting eye landed on the sidewalk in the same spot as had the first one and looked at me. I'm sure it was the same, returning for a second dip. And so I fired up my hose, flipped the sprinkler head to shower once more, cooed an invitation, and delighted in his jumping in once more.

An Earth Day Odyssey of sorts

The nursery opens at 9am. I pull into its lot at 9:01. I tell myself that my sense of urgency is because it's Earth Day, and I want to get going on my celebration of this planet we're lucky to call ours. But honestly, any day I know I'll get a few hours in the garden prompts this same hurried, eager response. 

"Just mulch and topsoil," I swear to myself. "You've damn near kept the nursery in business this past month. Be responsible," the angel on my shoulder says. Or was it the devil?

I don't even get a cart, just a cardboard tray. Just in case. I will myself past the annuals, their colors and whimsy calling to me like sirens. "You are fucking Homer," I whisper to myself. "You do not want to approach the rocky, floral, one-season shores."

But the freshly delivered palates of vegetables in the next tent throw me off; I am not expecting them. I tear off my blindfold and earplugs and jump toward the craggy bank strewn with young tomato plants. I cannot resist their herbal leaves and weeping yellow buds of promise. All I can think about is picking and eating handfuls of Sungolds and Sweet 100s, still warm from the sun, in just a month or two.

Then I see the hot pepper plants. And the Chinese eggplant. Like a thief in a store, I pluck up a few pots and hurry to the registers. "Just these, six bags of shredded hardwood mulch, and two bags of topsoil, please." 

I am kind-of Homer. I head home.

Garden gloves on, a bright sun warming my back, I dig and weed, fill in and transplant, mulch and water. A woodpecker taps assertively in a nearby tree. A happy melange of birds sing songs so cheery that they nearly circle back to irritating. But not quite. I consider that mulch is like nature's make-up; it makes everything look so polished.

"Oh, you are such a good worm. Look at you, Mr. Worm, doing such a fine job. Thank you." Any passerby might wonder about me, but actually, in our lovely new neighborhood, they might not. There are many avid gardeners in our midst. We feel an instant kinship. No one cares about my dirty hands or sweaty hair.

Tom arrives home early. I've hardly seen him since my birthday, and his being home when it's still light out is a nice treat. I seat the kids at the patio table with huge bowls of fresh, steaming spaghetti and meatballs, pour a glass of wine, and, as T gets a beer, ask if he will indulge me by taking a spin in the yard.

"Sure, honey. Where are my shoes?"

Arm in arm, we loop from the front door, around and back. "Look, hon, I divided and transplanted the heuchera! They're a native plant so especially well-suited to this region and also fairly hardy. The Cotton Easter is out of control, but I'll deal with it tomorrow. The azaleas and sedum look great."

"You've worked hard, Em. I like getting our yard in order."

"Me too, sweetie."

I think of how nice a hot bath will soon feel. How the soles of my feet are probably going to stay dirt-brown until September. How I don't care at all because their colored hue symbolizes hard work, investment, deep pleasure and our home.

I think of how I used to smirk at my parents as they made similar treks around our yard. How Mom always saw the big picture and Dad liked to assume tripod position -legs spread wide, one arm planting his torso, the other ready to pick any philandering weeds- to deal with two square inches of grass.

I am a perfect blend of them; eager to conquer and beautify the whole but deeply interested in hand-culling every single unwelcome guest from my plot. I am aware of what I look like in tripod position. I think of myself as Ouiser Boudreaux from Steel Magnolias, with a healthy dose of Imelda Marcos and Nigella Lawson thrown into the mix.

I think about how happy I am to be all of these things: dirty, sweaty, humble, fancy. How I used to hate grass and bugs and sweat and dirty fingernails, about those immature pubescent smirks as my parents spent time together after a long day, about what they showed me about a loving couple spending time together.

How I now talk to worms and don't shoo away bees and appreciate dirt and take my own husband for a garden walk before the sun sets. How I use birthday gift certificates on tomato plants and nitrile gloves. 

I think that really, every day is Earth Day, or should be. And I am thankful.

One bunny hops across the road while another scampers through a neighbor's yard. I know they terrorize gardens, but they are so freaking cute. I wave like a mad-woman at a fat squirrel in my bird-feeder. "Get away, you pilfering beast," I call out, even though he's awfully cute. I go in, he returns, I shoo him away once more, a cardinal moves in. I was rooting for the sparrow but he was too meek, so the cardinal won first dibs on all that the squirrel had unwillingly left behind.

I clean the boys' dishes, spoon them ice cream, pour some more wine and listen as my oldest FaceTimes with his poetry partner. It is the most sincere, darling flirting happening amidst the equally sincere homework assignment. 

"Mom, can K come for dinner one night?" 

"Of course, sweetie. I would love that! She is a wonderful girl." 

It's amazing how time passes and things change. A garden grows, bulbs self-cultivate, children mature, technology enables early attraction in a way I never knew. 

"Mom, can I tell you about our texting? It was so silly!" my oldest calls. And I go to him, even though it's late, even though I'm tired, because he wants to tell me everything they exchanged, which poem is his favorite, which emojis she used.

I wouldn't trade all of this for anything. 

40 in thirty-eight: Find Your Soil

And the days keep flying by, and one week from tomorrow, my baby turns 7 and I'm that much closer to 40 and we leave for Rome. That's another story for another day, not least because it's overwhelming to think of packing. Which, as you likely know, I loathe doing.

Today was breathtakingly beautiful- sunny, warm, breezy, not humid. It was perfect, really; the sort of spring day for which we've all been pining with increasing intensity as of late. 

I worked in the yard for as many spare minutes as I had, ripping out the insidious ivy that looks nice until you realize it's suffocating all your other plants and threatening to take over your yard a la The Blob. 

Despite my awareness that we're not yet past the possibility of a temperature dip into the frostly region, I went to the nursery for some herbs, arugula and flowers. Just a few things, just enough to keep the work needed to plant them in a reasonable realm, just enough to brighten the yard and start making it feel like ours. Just enough to sate my appetite.

Yards and gardens are like blank canvasses. They'll happily remain bare, colored in only by what occurs naturally be it ivy, weeds, or dust. But they'll also provide a thrilling slate on which to paint, if you're so inclined. 

I can tell this yard has been treated with chemicals and wasn't ever loved in the way I loved my last yard and gardens. I haven't yet found an earthworm, and Jack got a blazing rash after rolling in the grass yesterday; his sensitive skin has always been a bellwether for what is tender and what is not. 

So, there is work to be done, and that thrills me, for where do I lose myself so amnesiacally as I do in the soil? Nowhere really except perhaps in words. 

This is my bit of wisdom for you today, three days into the 40 in forty countdown: Find your soil

Putz and dally, look under and in, try and come up short, dip your toes in and find the grail. Do whatever you can to find your soil, the loamy black goulash into which you can pour your feelings, worries, hopes and frustrations. Into which you can knead your anger, sadness, joy and secrets. 

Find the soil in which you lose track of time and place and need to set an alarm so you don't forget to pick your kids up from school. Find the bit of earth in which you literally do not care how hot, sweaty, smelly and dirty you are because you're so deeply lost in the happy trance that plot fosters.

When I was little, I hated being dirty. I did not enjoy sweating, and I loathed bugs. In short, yard work was most definitely not my cup of tea. But I've always loved flowers (Nanny and Mom always had/have fresh flowers in their homes, mostly those they grew/grow themselves) and I've always seen how much satisfaction my parents and Nanny derived from working in their gardens.

When Tom and I moved into our first non-apartment home, we had a small backyard. Maybe it was nesting, maybe I was avoiding something, maybe I just wanted it to be pretty. I don't know but I planted flowers, and they grew and made me happy every day. I've been gardening like a fool since.

My thumb isn't totally green yet: inexplicably I am incapable of growing basil and rosemary which for most people are akin to weeds that require zero thought or tending. But I'm coming along, and I am telling you that when we moved, we left approximately 9 zillion fat and happy earthworms wriggling through the organic yard I'd turned it into. I enjoyed every bit of the process. 

I found my soil. Find yours!