8 April 2020: Daily Humor

These women, the ‘Golden Girls," have such great spirit!

So do these Great Orme Kashmiri goats just roaming the town.

And this wonderful, winning dog is just that: wonderful and winning. Oh, my heart.

Bonus poll: what are your favorite non-cat/dog animals?

Mine are: elephants, owls, goats, whales, and puffins. I very much hope to hear from y’all about this.

I would also enjoy responses to the following delight, shared by my dear friend, SJ. Which states are your favorites?

*A RECAP OF THE LAST THREE WEEKS*

 AMERICA: Oh my god! Coronavirus! What should we do?

CALIFORNIA: Shut down your state.

AMERICA: Wait... what? Why?

CALIFORNIA: Because 40 million people live here and we did it early, and it’s working.

OHIO: Whoa... whoa... let’s not be hasty now. The president said that this whole coronavirus thing is a democratic hoax.

CALIFORNIA: He also said that windmills cause cancer. Shut down your state.

TEXAS: But the president said that there are only 15 cases and soon there will be zero.

CALIFORNIA: The president can’t count to fifteen. Nor even spell it. Shut down your state.

NEW JERSEY: Us too?

CALIFORNIA: Yes, you guys too. Just like when Christie shut down the bridge, but it’s your whole state.

FLORIDA: But what about all these kids here on spring break?? They spend a lot of money here!

CALIFORNIA: Those kids invented the tide pod challenge. Shut down your state.

LOUISIANA: But wait let’s have Mardi Gras first. It entertains people.

CALIFORNIA: It also kills them. Shut it down.

GEORGIA: Ok well how about we keep the state open for all of our mega churches? Maybe we can all pray really hard until the coronavirus just goes away!

CALIFORNIA: Which is working like a charm for mass shootings. Jesus told us to tell you to shut down your state.

OKLAHOMA: What about the tigers?

CALIFORNIA: What about a dentist. Shut it down.

WYOMING: Hold up, maybe we should go county by county like the president said.

CALIFORNIA: Stop acting like there are counties in Wyoming. There are no counties in Wyoming. Wyoming is a county. Shut it down.

PENNSYLVANIA: But big coal.

CALIFORNIA: But big death. Shut it.

WEST VIRGINIA: But we were the last state to get coronavirus!

CALIFORNIA: And don’t make us explain to you why that was. Shut it down.

NORTH CAROLINA: But the republican national convention is coming here!

CALIFORNIA: SHUT... ok fine do what you want.

People, I have finally taken up needle felting, a craft I have long spent too much money purchasing the finished products of. And, I have expanded my pencil color collection like some sort of lunatic. I feel no qualms about this. #quarantine #allthetime #doyouwantmetogonuts?

I have visions of nests of little owls, potted succulents, and animals of all stripes (especially those from the above favorites list). After three hours yesterday, here is my first product:

big eyes always make animals cute

He is a frog of sorts. Fortunately, Oliver loved him passionately and so has adopted him, warts and all.

Happy Passover and Happy Easter to those celebrating. Take care of yourselves, friends!

7 April 2020: Daily Humor/Snark/Delight

John Krasinki is adorable and funny, and if you didn’t know, he recently started a YouTube show called Some Good News (SGN) which he broadcasts from, of course, his home. Episode 2, which rolled out this past weekend, was such a happy delight. I cried lovely tears after minute 8, and laughed a lot too. Please enjoy.

Meanwhile, in case you missed this when it dropped last year or if you’ve since forgotten it, it is absolutely worth your time. George Clooney is a gem. If you don’t want to listen to Jimmy, start 50 seconds in. Dumbf**kery is real, it’s armed, and it’s dangerous!

Now, I simply must balance these delightful shares with some horrifying real news from SCOTUS and Wisconsin. If you didn’t see, SCOTUS yesterday, by a 5–4 vote, “approved one of the most brazen acts of voter suppression in modern history. The court will nullify the votes of citizens who mailed in their ballots late—not because they forgot, but because they did not receive ballots until after Election Day due to the coronavirus pandemic. As Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg wrote in dissent, the court’s order “will result in massive disenfranchisement.” The Court determined that mail-in ballots must be postmarked by 4/7, today, and received by 4/13. Those postmarked after today will be thrown out.

In short, Wisconsin voters who had not received their absentee ballots had to choose today between going to the polls despite all advice to stay at home and away from others or relinquishing their right to vote. This is unacceptable.

Nicolle says it best:

Keep paying everyone you can afford to support. Housekeepers, gardeners, babysitters, etc. Even if they can be considered for state and/or federal assistance, that help is going to be delayed. They need help now. Thank you!

6 April 2020: Daily Humor

This one never gets old: dog fart -> cat puke. “MONTY, NO!!!”

What day is it? Bernadette tells the truth! Dead.

Today I nagged Oliver until he finally finished his GD book, after which he said, “It was so good. I’m sad it’s over.” >>>

And then I maniacally cleaned the garage, ultimately vacuuming it and reorganizing and LABELING organized shelves for T, and when I showed him, he said, “Oh, but X used to be over there, and Y was there.” >>>>

Coronavirus. >>>>

So finally we played Covid-Scrabble, and I won with Xandrew, and the final board looked like this, and now I’m going to drink some more and attend a Politics & Prose Live! event with Rebecca Solnit and Soraya Chemaly.

Namaste.